Wednesday, February 4, 2009

PapAmore': How could my Mom's Birthday be Happy, when my Dad is no longer here?

Once upon a time, because He so deeply loves us and really wanted us to see, God put a face on True Love.  He allowed us to witness an "in real life" story of what "to truly cherish someone" means.  

Lucky us, most of all, who saw this up close...and when we did, we were struck with the knowledge of...this must be what life and love really means.

When I think of PapAmore' - when I think of my sweet Mom, the very first thing that comes to sacred love.  

Love that you're in awe of, love that makes you personally feel better to be around, love that must be the kind we'll someday know in heaven, a love that, just from witnessing, I will always carry closely within the innermost part of me.

This was not a selfish love, this love didn't swallow up in each other and escape from the world...rather it gave the one it most adored on earth the passion, support and desire to do even that much more, for every life it knew.

My parents never stopped holding hands under the table...they never lost that "drown in you" gaze.  When my Dad told me that once he met my beautiful Mother, that he never once laid eyes on another woman again...I never once questioned the validity behind his words.

It was a "look what I have" love, a "I am so blessed" love, a love that promised to thank God first and foremost forever for their greatest gift of each other.

A never could wain love, a never should die love...

A love that made sense of my own life's disdain...gave my pain in my marriage, my consistently beaten up heart, hope and belief in the possibility of something else more.  The complete knowledge that God's love, the way He intended love, isn't just a "Bible Story" but rather truly lives and breathes in the very ones I most adore.

How do you live without your soul mate?  

However could God take my Dad from my Mom?  

Why wouldn't He want them to continue loving one another forever?  

Didn't He see the great hope their love brought to everyone else around?

Why is the essential other half of the epitome of love on longer here?

My Mom's birthday is in 3 days...and the one thing, the only thing, she no longer here...

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